5 Habits Keeping you STUCK & 5 Ways to Get UNSTUCK. 

 

There are a number of things you’re unintentionally doing that are keeping you STUCK and this feeling can lead you to feel frustrated, disheartened, despondent, or even numb if it persists. It also means you’re not progressing toward your goals and you’re stagnating…So if you’re feeling this now, or if you’ve ever felt it in the past, in this blog I want to share with you five habits that could be contributing to you feeling stuck, and simple yet essential principles to get ‘unstuck’, for good.

 

1. You’re an ‘Infomaniac’

The First reason why you might be stuck is: You’re an ‘Infomaniac’. 

Are you obsessed with learning and acquiring knowledge?

And maybe have a fear of being ‘out of the loop’?

Do you feel like you’re ‘always on’?

You might be someone who’s constantly Googling “How does this work?”

And “what is that made of?”

Or you might have an excessive need to constantly check emails, social media, and online news…It’s been called ‘infomania’ - which isn’t a clinical diagnosis but has been linked to a ‘fear of missing out.

I just came across the term recently but can definitely see how it’s playing out given this information-overloaded world we’re all living in and the compulsive need some people have to consume information…But here’s the thing…this insatiable thirst for knowledge or to have your finger on the pulse at all times can seriously reduce your ability to focus on tasks, reduce your mental sharpness and even impact your ability to get a good night’s sleep. And all of these things take you away from moving towards your goals and aspirations, so you end up feeling busy all the time, and yet not progressing - thereby keeping you stuck in information overload.

2. Knowing-doing gap

You’re stuck in the Knowing-doing gap. You’re passionate about self-development. You’re committed to your growth. And you already know a lot of stuff about what you ‘could’ to develop, to advance to achieve your goals and better your life… You know it intellectually…but you don’t do it. You don’t implement. You don’t apply your knowledge. This is called the ‘knowing-doing gap’

In this information-overloaded world, where a lot of us are also experiencing infomania, there’s almost a seductive quality associated with learning, absorbing consuming information. Each time you do you get that beautiful rewarding dopamine hit. But then you get stuck in self-development paralysis overload. So, its’ easier to keep consuming than it is to take action.

3 Achievement Addict

You’re an Achievement Addict.

You’re constantly looking for the next goal.… As soon as you achieve something, before you even have time to celebrate or acknowledge what you’ve done, you immediately think, “ok, what next?” and set yourself the

next goal. You feel guilty when you stop working - you experience productivity guilt the moment you stop creating, achieving producing, or working hard, and often have intrusive thoughts about how you’re not good enough because you haven’t done enough…Your sense of identity has become intertwined with what you do. You believe you ARE your achievements.

Not only that, you always feel short of time… that there’s too much to do and not enough hours in the day. You feel like you’re falling behind and this leads to self-judgment and self-criticism, and then pushing yourself even harder to compensate.

4. Endlessly Multitask.

 You endlessly multitask. You keep switching tasks at work or in life to avoid the pain of ‘boredom’… you’ve become impatient and want things here and now - even if it’s the dopamine hit of the switch. Switching keeps things fun and exciting. But, constantly switching can create a dopamine-addiction feedback loop - basically, you’re rewarding the brain for losing focus and for constantly searching for external stimulation…phone, email, new spreadsheet… which doesn’t help and actually conditions you to do it more…

5. Phone has become a limb

Your phone has become a limb. One of the most obvious reasons why people feel stuck is that they simply can’t focus, which means they can’t make progress on whatever it is they’re trying to do. They become stuck. And there’s one very obvious reason for that, aside from what we’ve already explored. If you’re addicted to your phone and it’s become almost like an extra limb you can’t live without, I’m guessing you have your phone right beside you on your desk when you’re trying to work, to focus, and to get stuff done…

Here’s why that’s not the best idea. Trying to focus while your phone is on your desk leads to a ‘brain drain’. Having your phone on your desk, even if it’s face down and on silent, negatively affects your ability to focus. A 2017 study found that The Mere Presence of your own smartphone reduces your available cognitive capacity.

Even if you are able to resist the temptation to check your phone, having to resist the urge eats up brain power and requires attentional resources - “don’t check my phone… don’t check my phone…”, and this means you have fewer available ‘brain’ resources to apply to the task at hand and to actually focus.

So, it keeps you stuck.

 

To help you get unstuck, here’s what you’re going to.

1. Take a step back

If you’re suffering from info mania, stop. Take a step back. Breathe.

The next time you have the urge to pick up your phone to Google something, open a new tab to read that pressing news article, or consume more information…resist. Resist for 5 minutes. This way you’re consciously reclaiming control and you can incrementally start to improve your capacity for longer focus periods, training your brain, and you’ll start to detach from your need to constantly have all the answers here and now.

2. Take Action

If you’re stuck in the knowing-doing gap and you can’t seem to take action or implement, go back to the last podcast you listened to, YouTube video you watched or book you read - and identify one thing you’re going to put into practice. Just one thing. And then take action. Don’t jump onto the next thing until you’ve invested time in implementation. You’ll be better at it.

3. Mindful Leisure Time

If you’re an Achievement Addict, carve out and schedule ‘mindful leisure time - it’s essential. Surround yourself with people who value you for who you are, not what you’ve done, and remind yourself that you are so much MORE than what you’ve achieved.

This might require you to unfollow connections on LinkedIn who continually post about their new promotion or their industry award… consciously stop comparing yourself and you’ll find that when you slow down there’s actually a lot to appreciate.

 

4. Recondition Yourself.

If you’re an endless multitasker, you’ll know that constantly ‘doing things’ and swapping between tasks is more stressful than rewarding. So you need to recondition yourself to become comfortable with being alone with yourself and your thoughts.

When you’re feeling a little agitated because you’re ‘bored’ with whatever you’re currently doing, or you’re ‘bored’ of doing nothing… see if you can resist the urge to open a new tab or reach for your phone. Stick with what you’re doing for just 5 minutes more- even if means being alone with your thoughts for an extra 5 minutes. This way you can incrementally start to improve your capacity for longer-focus periods, training your brain, and you might find that overtime that urge starts to become much weaker.

5. Help yourself to avoid brain drain    

If you’re addicted to your phone and you’re struggling to focus and your phone is on your desk - put it away. Put it out of sight - in a drawer, in your bag … wherever you won’t see it, or be tempted to check it. This makes sure you’re able to retain the highest possible cognitive and attentional capacity (and helps you avoid ‘brain drain’). Simple, but the reminder we all need.

The fact is, as humans, we thrive when we feel that we’re making progress.

Making progress on our goals has been shown in research to lead to more positive emotions and greater life satisfaction (and I’m sure we can all vouch for this from our own personal experience).

It feels great and we also know that when we aren’t progressing, we feel stuck. And sometimes the reason why we engage in any of the 5 things I just shared with you is that we don’t really know the underlying reason ‘why’ we’re doing what we’re doing. We’re just going through the motions, just like everyone else. But when we’re not clear on ‘why’ what we’re doing is important, and how it links to our underlying values and purpose for living, it’s all too easy to feel stuck, stagnant, and unfulfilled.

I hope this article will be an eye-opener for some habits that you need to change. Remember, it’s all about small incremental progress.

Find one that really resonated, and take action.

I’d love to hear from you in the comments- which of the 5 habits do you do most often?

Personality Traits of Alone People

 

 

9 Special Personality Traits of People Who Like To Be Alone.

                                   

Some people prefer to be by themselves have you ever caught any of your friends reading a novel in the middle of a loud party it is probably not a thing such people will rather be anywhere in the world than where there is so much noise people who are like this are usually creative and smart are you one of them. I am going to share with you nine personality traits of people who usually like to be alone they're usually loyal being the type to stay alone means a lot of things when dealing with people.

 

1. The ability to think things through dispassionately therefore when they make up their mind about things it usually stays that way people who are this way typically have principles they leave by it is very easy to get lost in the noise the world is a big place with lots of things to try people who are like this are usually not a type given to excessive drinking drugs and all devices it is actually an admirable trait it also indicates discipline and practice you can be loyal if you don't practice being loyal every day the great thing about loyalty is that it makes you reliable and people always want to work with reliable people if you don't have friends who behave this way yet perhaps you should find one

 

2. They are reflective can you remember your first day in college or even your first college exam these guys can being able to sit still all by yourself for hours on end daily does something to the mind it gives the mind that freedom to ruminate to and fro and access memories from the past being reflective is not just for recollection it is also for objective thinking reflective people tend to think things true they don't make quick decisions and always look at different angles reflective people also tend to read a lot if they don't what would they reflect on since they are not so social they get information and keep in touch with society through reading because of this habit they pay attention to details they are also not forgetful have you ever worked with a person like this they typically take less time to finish tasks because they are more focused they also think about the problems and give useful insights they are never shallow and often possess a good opinion on a lot of things this may not be liked by other people however because humans are primarily social animals a person who likes to be alone is not so social is he ?

3. They have a high level of self-awareness really means an understanding of oneself through introspection and honesty people who like to be alone tend to have a lot of introspection they are far more equipped with objective knowledge of themselves this makes them more confident they know they have to work hard know their weaknesses but chooses to extort your strength instead you can hardly tell them something about themselves they don't already know being self-aware is a gift it makes you immune to people's opinion about you when you understand how you operate what people say wouldn't matter the funny thing is that such people seldom are in the company of people who can chip away at their confidence if you always feel low try being alone for at least one day in a

week you'll be amazed at what will happen to you when you spend time alone you will resolve many mental struggles and start to think of other things while you're having a cup of coffee you might just think of an idea an idea that brings about a significant innovative difference in how things are done in your area of interest this is not possible with a lot of noise this is perhaps why people who are this way are usually creative’.

4. They value their time more than others time is everything we can become successful or fail depending on how well we use the time we have if you like to hang out with friends even when you discuss nothing productive people who like to be alone are more self-aware they know what they want and what really matters they respect their time and that of orders they don't take lightly to people not being punctual to meetings and tend to associate with people like them more than others they have an idea of what they can accomplish with the time they have when they are alone they are either thinking about the things they are working on or relieving great memories they know how much can be accomplished by just sleeping instead of binge watching movies on Netflix they manage their time better because of high self-awareness they may even know their temperaments in order to work more efficiently with others

 

5. They are great listeners have you ever met someone you spoke to for the first time and couldn't stop talking to them people who are always alone have this effect on people they develop empathy by reflecting on many things that happen to others they, therefore, try to be there for others as much as they can make donations anonymously with a smile they're a bit conservative though if you meet someone like this enjoy the moment most people are bad listeners they just want to talk about themselves and your achievements they may even interrupt you in the middle of sharing something personal to take a call.

 

6. They are bold people who are like this spend time thinking about their fears when you spend enough time on something you will find a way there is always a way as time passes you will start to rationalize your fear you will realize that it didn't really make sense then you will rise above it and become free have you met someone who takes on every tax he is given without complaint even if he has no idea how to go about it observe the person carefully to spend a lot of time alone if you do this you will build your self-confidence through affirmation and self-awareness they can take on a lot of things without the fear of failure many of them have made peace with failure how about you if you want to have meaningful conversations around.

Real issues that people face try talking to anyone like this you will be amazed at the insights they can provide they sometimes play scenarios in their head to see what it would look like they are quite creative in this ability to imagine what a presentation can look like and the response can boost their confidence and help them take up bold activities other people wouldn't dream of.

 

7. They are comfortable in their own skin people who are like this are usually very comfortable with themselves they don't falls over moles in their face the color of their suit or people staring at them from afar in fact they are contents to keep them stirring if it means they will leave him the hell alone they can take a tea instead of regular soda if they prefer tea and work

in the library, if it is allowed they know what they look like and are okay with it but shaming them won't work they probably know more about their condition in detail than you do.

 

8. They are highly knowledgeable they're usually like this because they read a lot the read books and sciences and arts and admire beautiful things they sometimes have curious hobbies like sitting in the garden to watch beds in a tree or taking a hike but who knows maybe if you adopt a curious habit you may spend some quality time alone since none of your friends would like to join in having a lot of knowledge about different things can make you stand out from your pairs who knows you may even get offers if you impress senior executives from other companies.

 

9. The value of people who like to stay alone value their friends a lot they don't have that many they also have mutual respect for people and generally don't have time to get involved there are so many benefits to being alone if you're alone a lot you tend to have a more definite sense of purpose than if you don't people who spend time alone are also more intentional about their pursuits and goals they don't put off things they should do because they are not always in tune with popular social culture and trends this makes them more focused most of the time.

 

 

 

How to Beat Own Ego

  

In modern society, ego is considered to be a weakness that affects your relationship with others. If an individual has trouble relating to others, he or she will suffer from low self-esteem. In other words, there can be certain things that you feel are beyond your control. You can’t control how to do this because it is impossible. However, when you feel like you lack confidence, a person who has no self-control will not take full responsibility for their bad behavior. It usually takes time before realize this, especially if the person still believes in his/her ego. Here are some tips on how to beat your own ego by allowing yourself to get happy once in a while.

 

Ego plays tricks on you by telling you that everyone around you must see you as a superior. You might even lie about certain things so that they don’t realize what you are really feeling. This is called the “I’m not talking” syndrome, which is basically just trying to cover up a secret or lie that your feelings are true. In most cases, your eyes are your eyes instead of your heart.

 

Some actions might help you clear your mind about ego like having friends or family members who have problems with you. They can encourage you to make improvements in your personal life, and can also teach you lessons about how to cope with people, like when you are under a lot of stress.

 

If you want to overcome your ego, start looking at yourself from a different angle. Try being more loving towards yourself and others and try to practice self-love. When you allow yourself to focus on yourself, then the only thing you will ever have to talk about is yourself. People will always try to put you down, but when you talk honestly about yourself, you will find it easier for them to open up their hearts and understand you more. So start thinking in this way and stop letting your ego dictate who you are. By doing this, you can gradually come closer to finding total peace within yourself.

 

 If you think that your ego makes you weak and insecure, start practicing courage in facing your fears and doubts. Confidence is the key when dealing with issues that are difficult and can’t be solved. You cannot be confident in anything unless you fear something. In life, you have to face challenges head-on without hesitation and keep your ego weak to become better.

The ego can never be defeated. No matter how much you try, you will be faced with situations where you have to deal with the issues. And you will fail. That is why it is important to learn how to accept failure even for your ego. Accepting failure and showing resilience is very helpful as well and it will eventually make you stronger. Resilience is hard to master because it takes time and dedication. But if you choose to, you can get better results and achieve great success within your goals.

When having any kind of fight with another individual whether it’s over money or any other issue, you can always ask him the name of the person. The best option is to simply call out the name in public. This is how egos show insecurity because they don’t want to show their feelings. Instead, they want to hide behind the mask of their ego. Sometimes you need such tactics. So when you need to have a tough conversation with someone, just remember this advice. Instead of using your ego to protect you, use this technique and enjoy the conversation with someone else.

The next step is to change negative thoughts by repeating positive ones and replacing them with positive ones. Asking yourself questions like “What am I going to do today? What am I going to do next week?” are some useful techniques to practice self-love towards others. These questions will help you visualize yourself as successful instead of focusing on your shortcomings.

In case you have to go against your ego, take action in small ways toward changing some aspects of your life. For example, by avoiding eating chips, you can practice kindness toward others. Another small act might include helping those who need help but cannot help themselves like during class time. These small ways can go a long way to show self-love towards others.

 

 

Lastly, don’t give the impression that you are too strong-willed. We all struggle to do whatever we need to do every day and sometimes; it could be tough to accept defeat once in a while. Just say, “No, I am not strong-willed. Yes, I will lose on some occasions but I am working hard to overcome the loss.” Everyone wants to be loved by others because they lack self-confidence. Don’t let your ego deceive you and keep your ego on high ground. Be kind to yourself and change your mindset in a positive light. Eventually, that will make you stronger.